SITUATION: Low disk space.



The TECHNICAL THUG
Writes a suite of scripts to monitor disk usage, maintain a database of historic disk usage, predict future disk usage via least squares regression analysis, identify users who are more than a standard deviation over the mean, and send mail to the offending parties. Places script in cron. Disk usage does not change, since disk-hogs, by nature, either ignore script-generated mail, or file it away in triplicate.

The ADMINISTRATIVE FASCIST
Puts disk usage policy in motd. Uses disk quotas. Allows no exceptions, thus crippling development work. Locks accounts that go over quota.

The MANIAC 
# cd /home
# rm -rf `du -s * | sort -rn | head -1 | awk '{print $2}'`;

The IDIOT 
# cd /home
# cat `du -s * | sort -rn | head -1 | awk '{ printf "%s/*\n", $2}'` | compress